Let’s face it. There are a growing number of irritating people on this planet. And we are all annoyed by different things. If you don’t see things my way, I’m probably one of the people that annoys you. Do I care? Not really. And that is the probably. We’ve all got annoying traits, and most of us have the attitude that if we bother somebody, it is their loss. But there are nine irritating personality types that most of us can agree annoy everybody. So if you find yourself being one of the people on this list, it’s time you take a step back and evaluate yourself.
The Know It All
We’ve all got one in our family or circle of friends. The person that can tell you the right way to do everything. From washing the dishes, to finding a job; brushing your teeth to wiping after you made a doo doo; booking a flight to paris or booking a flight to the moon, there isn’t anything they haven’t already done before, and they’ve always done it the best way you can. If that’s not irritating enough, try correcting one of these people. They will argue with you until the sun expires that they are right. However if you want a little vindication, wait a couple weeks after correcting them, and bring up the same topic. This time take their original point of view and watch them tell you the right way. Odds are it will be the information that you corrected them with weeks prior. Congratulations! You just made this person look like an ass.
The Person That Has A Story For Everything
This person is very similar to the know it all, however they’ve just got a story for everything, and it’s usually quite embellished. If you’re going on a vacation to Italy, you can bet they’re going to tell you all about their week spent in Rome. If you play in a band and get an opportunity to open for a really popular group, they will tell you about the time they went on tour opening up for MC Hammer… it was a tiring gig but they were just 2 Legit 2 Quit. If you’re becoming Catholic, the pope kissed their baby once. The only way to keep your sanity around these people is to use them as entertainment. Just start talking about the most random stuff you can think of and enjoy the stories. Perhaps one of the ideas will be so great you can steal it and write a script and become rich and famous.
You know the type. God bless them, they aren’t afraid to fix anything and they usually won’t charge you… which is good because in a couple weeks it will be broken again.
The Doctor, The Lawyer or The (Insert Profession They Didn’t Study Here)
Nothing is worse than being sick, going to the doctor and then running into this schmuck. They will tell you all about how the doctor misdiagnosed you and what you really need to do to get better is find three ounces of bluegrass from the hills of Kentucky, one once of urine from a sabertooth tiger (in their eyes it’s just a conspiracy that they’re extinct), and a teardrop straight from the eye of an angel from heaven. Once you’ve got all that place it all inside the Holy Grail and mix it together with the horn of one dead unicorn. If you do that, you’ll instantly be cured. You should probably trust them over the doctor. After all they’ve already diagnosed everyone else they know with the same problem and solution.
They aren’t just a byproduct of dating the wrong person. Clingers exist everywhere and they always want to be around you. It’s best to just be kind to these people when they are around you and pray they don’t stay long. They’re going to cling wether they like or dislike you. Wouldn’t you rather have them desiring your friendship instead of hating you if they’re going to give you their attention either way?
The Negative Nancy
Oh my favorite. Never have anything positive to say. You shouldn’t use that toilet at Walmart if you don’t want herpes. The world is ending tomorrow… they know this because there have been so many natural disasters lately. Well stop watching CNN then (sorry CNN don’t mean to pick on you alone). The news is a Negative Nancy en masse. Disasters have happened since the beginning of time and the world is still here. Hello! Dinosaurs are all dead, probably because a big ass rock slammed into New Mexico or something, but the world is still here. The worst part is these people typically turn those around them into Nancies as well. Bleh! Go home Nancy!
This person constantly tries to talk you out of everything. They may feel you’re incapable of said task, or that it is too dangerous. There are two types of discouragers. The more annoying is the jealous discourager. They are typically just jealous of the way things are going for you so they try to stop you from enjoying life and making life enhancing decisions. The second slightly less type is the worrying discourager. They just worry that you’re making decisions you’ll regret or that could harm you in some way, so they try to talk you out of them.
The, “It’s Only A Good Idea If It’s My Idea” Type
These people just like to control things. Perhaps if it’s family they want to live vicariously through someone. Or perhaps they just like to be in control of everything. The bottom line is if you want to plant flowers in front of the house, these people will tell you shrubs are a much better idea. If you want to buy a Mustang they will tell you to get a minivan. There’s really only one way to handle this person. Do your research ahead of time and figure out how their brain works. If you really want a Mustang, tell them you’re thinking of getting a minivan. They will tell you that you only live once so you should get something you’ll enjoy. Something fast and sporty.
The Worst Of All
This one takes the cake. The most irritating personality of all is the one that combines ALL of the eight we’ve gone over. If you know one of these people you can only do one thing. RUN!
For some bonus reading check out Lisa Chatroop’s Eight Annoying Co-Workers You’ll Find In Every Office.
Did I miss anything? What personalities annoy you?
Photo Credit: Tim Caynes